Wednesday, November 17, 2010
This might be a tough post. Try and bear with me.
I used to be what I like to call an 'open-minded judgemental'. I would embrace all of the differences I could find, but would judge those who didn't embrace all the differences that I did. And so, not realizing the silliness in this, I kept on thinking I was on to something.
I was a tricky hypocrite with a cause. Thinking I held the key to all understanding, I was actually just standing in my own way, only adding to the problem.
And so then a year of the huffs came. I was frustrated in general, a touch sadder than my usual self, and a bit unaware of the world that surrounded me. I was missing something.
So I started searching-searching for something that might help to fill that missing piece. First, I read a Thich Nhat Hanh book called Living Buddah, Living Christ. Now, I was not born into a family of Buddhists or Christians, or a family of any particular religion, for that matter. I had no idea what either one (Buddhism and Christianity) was truly about, and so I had prematurely decided that religion of any sort just wasn't my cup of tea. But this book helped me realize how wrong I really was. It made me want more- and so I got my hands on the Bible.
In doing all of this exploratory work, I've found that love is the common denominator. And I like that. And I've learned that love isn't just a magic sensation that we share with a select few in our individual lives. Playing it that way, the safe way, is actually quite a dangerous way. Love is a choice. It's not even always easy. It does not stop at my husband, my dog, or my wonderful Momma. For me, making that switch from small love to all encompassing love was not immediate, and it is not complete or perfect. But it is changing me, for what I believe to be the better.
And so while some may say it is unrealistic, my hope is that one day- we can all make that switch together. Everyone. Blue, Black, White, Green, Gay, Straight, Married, Single, Buddhist, Christian, Jewish, Atheists, Republicans, Democrats- Everyone. Because while I may call myself one thing, and you call yourself another, we are all here. And we all need to try. Calling him names and bullying outside our borders isn't making anything easier. So let's try. Because maybe- just maybe- it might help us all out.
To those that have been living this, I thank you. Forgive me for just realizing that I was being a true fool.
Learning to Love,